On Solitude: Learning to be alone — and enjoy it.

I enjoy my alone time. After a long day of classes and work, I look forward to the hour or two before bed, alone, in my bedroom, playing music and curling up with a good book or binge watching Shameless. 

I don't think eating alone at a restaurant is shameful, or that you have to find a companion in order to attend an event. Go where you want, when you want and every now and then, go alone. 

Learning to enjoy being alone is a process. It's not particularly easy to enjoy your own company after a break-up, nor is it a fun time during an episode of depression. But it's in the lowest of lows that you need yourself more than ever. 

It's in those low's that you need to learn how to re-love yourself and re-discover who you are because it's in those moments that you tend to forget. 

It doesn't have to be grand or even happen all at once. You can start small with going on a walk alone or going to a coffee shop and working on a personal project. 

Big or small, find time in your day to do something for yourself and do it by yourself. 

Teach yourself a craft, learn a language, start a puzzle or new book, make a list of events happening in your area and plan to go to a few of them.

Learning how to be alone  and be content in being alone  — forced me to face myself. Something we don't do as often as we think. It's easy to turn off your own internal noise when you're constantly in the presence of others, easier to see yourself through their eyes when you don't give yourself the time and space to see yourself and reflect on who you are. 

How often do you ask yourself what's next? What you're doing well? What you need to improve on? Your strongest quality? Your favorite food? Your least favorite activity? Why? When you like to go to bed? Where you would go if you could pack up and leave tomorrow?

Date yourself. Ask yourself out. Ask yourself a ton of questions, get to know yourself and most importantly, learn how to fall in love with yourself. Because our most neglected relationship is the one we have with ourselves. 


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